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Wendy Valdez shares her journey as a mom to a child who has spina bifida

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Joan Leary

<div> </div><p>Wendy Valdez inspired a lot of netizens with her heartwarming Instagram post where she shared what she, her family, and her son Seth had to go through just to make her baby well.</p><p>Wendy’s son has hip dysplasia. “It&#x27;s a condition of the hip where the bone connected to the hip is not fully developed. He had this since he was born. If not corrected, his right leg which has the dislocated hip, would continue to shorten,” she explained. Her son needed to wear a pavlik harness for months.</p><p>Aside from hip dysplasia, Seth also has mild hydrocephalus and these are just the effects of spina bifida. According to <a href="https://www.webmd.com/parenting/baby/tc/spina-bifida-topic-overview"><u>WebMd</u></a>, Spina bifida is a type of birth defect called a neural tube defect. It occurs when the bones of the spine (vertebrae) don&#x27;t form properly around part of the baby&#x27;s spinal cord.</p><p>Because of these complications, it was a difficult for baby Seth to do normal things such as wearing clothes, bathing, latching on Wendy, and so on.</p><p>“His ortho appointments were very late at night. I was annoyed at first, but met other babies and moms with us in that journey. Seth&#x27;s check ups for his head on the other hand, were early mornings. I met some people in that venture too. I prayed for his hip and head constantly, and asked for prayers from others as well. Really excited for when the harness would be removed, or have lesser time to wear them at least. Every time we have a check up, I look forward to what the doctor has to say; but every check up, his hip seemed to get worse, and the excess water in his head continued build up... and my heart, seems to fall apart.”</p><blockquote class="instagram-media" data-instgrm-captioned="" data-instgrm-permalink="https://www.instagram.com/p/BhgjmvQAj5d/" data-instgrm-version="8" style="background:#FFF;border:0;border-radius:3px;box-shadow:0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15);margin:1px;max-width:658px;padding:0;width:calc(100% - 2px)"><div style="padding:8px"><div style="background:#F8F8F8;line-height:0;margin-top:40px;padding:50% 0;text-align:center;width:100%"><div style="background:url(data:image/png;base64,iVBORw0KGgoAAAANSUhEUgAAACwAAAAsCAMAAAApWqozAAAABGdBTUEAALGPC/xhBQAAAAFzUkdCAK7OHOkAAAAMUExURczMzPf399fX1+bm5mzY9AMAAADiSURBVDjLvZXbEsMgCES5/P8/t9FuRVCRmU73JWlzosgSIIZURCjo/ad+EQJJB4Hv8BFt+IDpQoCx1wjOSBFhh2XssxEIYn3ulI/6MNReE07UIWJEv8UEOWDS88LY97kqyTliJKKtuYBbruAyVh5wOHiXmpi5we58Ek028czwyuQdLKPG1Bkb4NnM+VeAnfHqn1k4+GPT6uGQcvu2h2OVuIf/gWUFyy8OWEpdyZSa3aVCqpVoVvzZZ2VTnn2wU8qzVjDDetO90GSy9mVLqtgYSy231MxrY6I2gGqjrTY0L8fxCxfCBbhWrsYYAAAAAElFTkSuQmCC);display:block;height:44px;margin:0 auto -44px;position:relative;top:-22px;width:44px"> </div></div><div style="margin:8px 0 0 0;padding:0 4px"><a href="https://www.instagram.com/p/BhgjmvQAj5d/" style="color:#000;font-family:Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;font-style:normal;font-weight:normal;line-height:17px;text-decoration:none;word-wrap:break-word" target="_blank">SETH UPDATE PART1 Why God won&#x27;t heal when I know He can? On Seth&#x27;s 2nd monthsary celebration, he had to wear a pavlik harness for his hip dysplasia. It&#x27;s a condition of the hip where the bone connected to the hip is not fully developed. He had this since he was born. If not corrected, his right leg which has the dislocated hip, would continue to shorten. The doctor said he has to wear the harness 24/7, to hopefully correct his hip, before he turns 6 months old. Every 2 weeks, we also had to visit his neurologist, to monitor his mild hydrocephalus. These, and other complications, are the effects of his Spina Bifida. Our 2nd month celebration of his birth was cut short, because he was crying incessantly due to the discomfort of the harness. We took some photos, then went home immediately. At home, we had to learn to remove the harness and bathe him in less than 11minutes. Find a way to carry him and change his diapers; and still do the tense, for his leg muscles to develop. I cried a bit for the fact that he can&#x27;t wear some pants, or other clothes. Can&#x27;t carry him, or breastfeed him the way I used to, because his legs have been spread so wide apart by the harness. His ortho appointments were very late at night. I was annoyed at first, but met other babies and moms with us in that journey. Seth&#x27;s check ups for his head on the other hand, were early mornings. I met some people in that venture too. I prayed for his hip and head constantly, and asked for prayers from others as well. Really excited for when the harness would be removed, or have lesser time to wear them at least. Everytime we have a check up, I look forward to what the doctor has to say; but every check up, his hip seem to get worse, and the excess water in his head continued build up... and my heart, seems to fall apart. I stare blankly after his last check up, where the doctor said he may have to wear a brace after the harness, or a cast, or go through a hip surgery. I asked God why his hip and head gets worse, when we were doing our best, and endlessly praying. My bible readings were about Jesus healing people left and right. Why won&#x27;t He heal Seth when I know He can? PART2 ON MY NEXT POST</a></div><p style="color:#c9c8cd;font-family:Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;line-height:17px;margin-bottom:0;margin-top:8px;overflow:hidden;padding:8px 0 7px;text-align:center;text-overflow:ellipsis;white-space:nowrap">A post shared by <a href="https://www.instagram.com/wendyvaldez_garcia/" style="color:#c9c8cd;font-family:Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;font-style:normal;font-weight:normal;line-height:17px" target="_blank"> Wendy Valdez-Garcia</a> (@wendyvaldez_garcia) on <time dateTime="2018-04-13T11:19:04+00:00" style="font-family:Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;line-height:17px">Apr 13, 2018 at 4:19am PDT</time></p></div></blockquote><script async="" defer="" src="~//www.instagram.com/embed.js" type="text/javascript"></script><div> </div><p>Despite the challenges they were facing, Wendy kept her faith and constantly prayed for her son. However, after months of going back and forth to the hospital, the results just seemed to get worse.</p><p>“After a few weeks on the brace, we found out through his regular xrays, that it wasn&#x27;t holding the hip at all. There was no support on the waist, so it continues to fall off with a slight movement of the right leg. I would not want naman for his right leg to be immobile, just so the hip would connect properly.”</p><blockquote class="instagram-media" data-instgrm-captioned="" data-instgrm-permalink="https://www.instagram.com/p/BhgkTGSgIW7/" data-instgrm-version="8" style="background:#FFF;border:0;border-radius:3px;box-shadow:0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15);margin:1px;max-width:658px;padding:0;width:calc(100% - 2px)"><div style="padding:8px"><div style="background:#F8F8F8;line-height:0;margin-top:40px;padding:50% 0;text-align:center;width:100%"><div style="background:url(data:image/png;base64,iVBORw0KGgoAAAANSUhEUgAAACwAAAAsCAMAAAApWqozAAAABGdBTUEAALGPC/xhBQAAAAFzUkdCAK7OHOkAAAAMUExURczMzPf399fX1+bm5mzY9AMAAADiSURBVDjLvZXbEsMgCES5/P8/t9FuRVCRmU73JWlzosgSIIZURCjo/ad+EQJJB4Hv8BFt+IDpQoCx1wjOSBFhh2XssxEIYn3ulI/6MNReE07UIWJEv8UEOWDS88LY97kqyTliJKKtuYBbruAyVh5wOHiXmpi5we58Ek028czwyuQdLKPG1Bkb4NnM+VeAnfHqn1k4+GPT6uGQcvu2h2OVuIf/gWUFyy8OWEpdyZSa3aVCqpVoVvzZZ2VTnn2wU8qzVjDDetO90GSy9mVLqtgYSy231MxrY6I2gGqjrTY0L8fxCxfCBbhWrsYYAAAAAElFTkSuQmCC);display:block;height:44px;margin:0 auto -44px;position:relative;top:-22px;width:44px"> </div></div><div style="margin:8px 0 0 0;padding:0 4px"><a href="https://www.instagram.com/p/BhgkTGSgIW7/" style="color:#000;font-family:Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;font-style:normal;font-weight:normal;line-height:17px;text-decoration:none;word-wrap:break-word" target="_blank">(Part1 on my previous post) SETH UPDATE PART2 Trust the Process I cried to the Lord for answers. I cried to the Lord for my heartaches. I had to accept the fact that sometimes, He doesn&#x27;t heal, and yet He is still completely powerful, in control, is good, and that He loves us. I was so broken. We continued to go to the doctor. I met some moms and talk to them. Told one mom that it&#x27;s ok to cry sometimes, and admit it&#x27;s difficult. Ask God for strength to keep moving forward, and find comfort. Seth got his braces on his 6th month. We were advised to stop his excercises first, and give way to the development of his right hip. With his head, all we can do is to do cranial ultrasounds every 2 weeks and pray. His head also kept growing and off the measurements. After a few weeks on the brace, we found out through his regular xrays, that it wasn&#x27;t holding the hip at all. There was no support on the waist, so it continues to fall off with a slight movement of the right leg. I would not want naman for his right leg to be imobile, just so the hip would connect properly. Doctor said, if we can&#x27;t find a way to hold the waist part of the brace, we would need to cast him for 4 months, then back to his hip brace for support. If that won&#x27;t still work, Seth would have to go through another surgery to connect his right hip. If not, his right leg would continue to shrink; and even if he stands, his body would be bent to the right because of the shorter leg. It was late at night ,and I was really tired. I said, &quot;Lord what do you want me to do this time? Cry and feel disheartened again? Why do we all have to go through all that for months with the harness, and his hip had only gotten worse? What was all that for?&quot; Then the Lord seem to whisper in my heart...&quot;Trust the process&quot;. PART 3 ON MY NEXT POST.</a></div><p style="color:#c9c8cd;font-family:Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;line-height:17px;margin-bottom:0;margin-top:8px;overflow:hidden;padding:8px 0 7px;text-align:center;text-overflow:ellipsis;white-space:nowrap">A post shared by <a href="https://www.instagram.com/wendyvaldez_garcia/" style="color:#c9c8cd;font-family:Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;font-style:normal;font-weight:normal;line-height:17px" target="_blank"> Wendy Valdez-Garcia</a> (@wendyvaldez_garcia) on <time dateTime="2018-04-13T11:25:08+00:00" style="font-family:Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;line-height:17px">Apr 13, 2018 at 4:25am PDT</time></p></div></blockquote><script async="" defer="" src="~//www.instagram.com/embed.js" type="text/javascript"></script><div> </div><p>Wendy still “trusted the process” and kept positive. With the help of her family and husband, they were all able to adjust to the situation.</p><blockquote class="instagram-media" data-instgrm-captioned="" data-instgrm-permalink="https://www.instagram.com/p/Bhgl8f1AvI9/" data-instgrm-version="8" style="background:#FFF;border:0;border-radius:3px;box-shadow:0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15);margin:1px;max-width:658px;padding:0;width:calc(100% - 2px)"><div style="padding:8px"><div style="background:#F8F8F8;line-height:0;margin-top:40px;padding:50% 0;text-align:center;width:100%"><div style="background:url(data:image/png;base64,iVBORw0KGgoAAAANSUhEUgAAACwAAAAsCAMAAAApWqozAAAABGdBTUEAALGPC/xhBQAAAAFzUkdCAK7OHOkAAAAMUExURczMzPf399fX1+bm5mzY9AMAAADiSURBVDjLvZXbEsMgCES5/P8/t9FuRVCRmU73JWlzosgSIIZURCjo/ad+EQJJB4Hv8BFt+IDpQoCx1wjOSBFhh2XssxEIYn3ulI/6MNReE07UIWJEv8UEOWDS88LY97kqyTliJKKtuYBbruAyVh5wOHiXmpi5we58Ek028czwyuQdLKPG1Bkb4NnM+VeAnfHqn1k4+GPT6uGQcvu2h2OVuIf/gWUFyy8OWEpdyZSa3aVCqpVoVvzZZ2VTnn2wU8qzVjDDetO90GSy9mVLqtgYSy231MxrY6I2gGqjrTY0L8fxCxfCBbhWrsYYAAAAAElFTkSuQmCC);display:block;height:44px;margin:0 auto -44px;position:relative;top:-22px;width:44px"> </div></div><div style="margin:8px 0 0 0;padding:0 4px"><a href="https://www.instagram.com/p/Bhgl8f1AvI9/" style="color:#000;font-family:Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;font-style:normal;font-weight:normal;line-height:17px;text-decoration:none;word-wrap:break-word" target="_blank">(Part2 on my previous post) SETH UPDATE PART 3 What a Privilage And so I did, I trusted the process. Instead of focusing on the healing part of this narrative, I just accepted that all these had to happen. Seth had to be in a harness, and in braces. We have to work our way to enjoy him, and take care of him while he&#x27;s on them. Seth&#x27;s not latching often anymore, because of his wide apart legs. I miss that; but we would hug while he is on my chest to sleep instead. We found stretchable shorts to fit him. I became so good at putting diapers and cleaning him. Mom found a really good fabric conditioner, that made Seth smell good, even if he doesn&#x27;t shower for weeks; so he won&#x27;t have time off the braces. The Lord gave us wisdom on what to put on the brace, to hold it up. We improvised with bigkis tied up on his shoulders to the brace. His sando, pinned up for more support. I would kiss his head, and sang praises to the Lord while doing so. I grew fondness in coming to our check ups. Sometimes, it would just be Seth and I. Not like there was something fun to do at the hospital at night , or early mornings, except that I get to eat at my favorite food stores, and have my husband, and his parents visit us there.Not like there was something to look forward to doing, or expect good news about Seth&#x27;s healing, which I haven&#x27;t heard for months. But what made me eager to come, was the knowing that GOD WANTED ME TO BE THERE...IN THOSE MOMENTS, HE IS WITH ME... He is doing something in my heart, everytime I go. Doing something in our faith. Transforming our character. Building our trust. Me and my husband as parents. Me, my sister and mom as caretakers of Seth. And me, as his mom, and bestfriend. I get to be in this journey. I get to talk to other people about Jesus. I get to encourage other moms; or just witness what super natural strength God gives them, to take care of their special needs children. To love in a way that they could give up so much of this world, and do what they can, for their child. To endure, even when hope is dim...To take delight amidst the weariness. What a privilage... What a privilage. PART 4 ON MY NEXT POST</a></div><p style="color:#c9c8cd;font-family:Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;line-height:17px;margin-bottom:0;margin-top:8px;overflow:hidden;padding:8px 0 7px;text-align:center;text-overflow:ellipsis;white-space:nowrap">A post shared by <a href="https://www.instagram.com/wendyvaldez_garcia/" style="color:#c9c8cd;font-family:Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;font-style:normal;font-weight:normal;line-height:17px" target="_blank"> Wendy Valdez-Garcia</a> (@wendyvaldez_garcia) on <time dateTime="2018-04-13T11:39:31+00:00" style="font-family:Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;line-height:17px">Apr 13, 2018 at 4:39am PDT</time></p></div></blockquote><script async="" defer="" src="~//www.instagram.com/embed.js" type="text/javascript"></script><div> </div><p>On Seth’s 9<sup>th</sup> month, they got back from their usual checkup and she was pleased with the positive results.</p><p>“For how many weeks, all we heard was his head was getting larger, but that day was different. God answered my prayers differently this time.”</p><blockquote class="instagram-media" data-instgrm-captioned="" data-instgrm-permalink="https://www.instagram.com/p/BhgpCBog9Ro/" data-instgrm-version="8" style="background:#FFF;border:0;border-radius:3px;box-shadow:0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15);margin:1px;max-width:658px;padding:0;width:calc(100% - 2px)"><div style="padding:8px"><div style="background:#F8F8F8;line-height:0;margin-top:40px;padding:50% 0;text-align:center;width:100%"><div style="background:url(data:image/png;base64,iVBORw0KGgoAAAANSUhEUgAAACwAAAAsCAMAAAApWqozAAAABGdBTUEAALGPC/xhBQAAAAFzUkdCAK7OHOkAAAAMUExURczMzPf399fX1+bm5mzY9AMAAADiSURBVDjLvZXbEsMgCES5/P8/t9FuRVCRmU73JWlzosgSIIZURCjo/ad+EQJJB4Hv8BFt+IDpQoCx1wjOSBFhh2XssxEIYn3ulI/6MNReE07UIWJEv8UEOWDS88LY97kqyTliJKKtuYBbruAyVh5wOHiXmpi5we58Ek028czwyuQdLKPG1Bkb4NnM+VeAnfHqn1k4+GPT6uGQcvu2h2OVuIf/gWUFyy8OWEpdyZSa3aVCqpVoVvzZZ2VTnn2wU8qzVjDDetO90GSy9mVLqtgYSy231MxrY6I2gGqjrTY0L8fxCxfCBbhWrsYYAAAAAElFTkSuQmCC);display:block;height:44px;margin:0 auto -44px;position:relative;top:-22px;width:44px"> </div></div><div style="margin:8px 0 0 0;padding:0 4px"><a href="https://www.instagram.com/p/BhgpCBog9Ro/" style="color:#000;font-family:Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;font-style:normal;font-weight:normal;line-height:17px;text-decoration:none;word-wrap:break-word" target="_blank">(Part3 on my previous post) SETH UPDATE PART4 Unexpected Breakthrough On his 9th month, we went to visit his doctors for the usual check ups of his hip and head. We went in for another late night check for his hip. Did the usual xray first, then wait in line for his turn, for what the doctor has to say. We have learned well how to manuever Seth on braces and put them. Mabilis ko na din nakakabit yun safety pin sa sando. Tie his bigkis for the braces support everytime I would bathe him. Dati kasi, lagi ako natutusok ng safety pin. I have to remove all those attached to him, and put them all back fast, after every swimming and bathing. I am really blessed that my mom and sister are always here to help me. While waiting for the doctor to come, we were playful. When it was Seth&#x27;s turn, the doctor asked what we did to support the brace with. We showed her, and she said it was cute. Hehe. Just like a devised pavlik harness that Seth wore when he was a baby. When she examined the xray, she said it was ok. She then looked at the previous xrays and compared. She then said, that the hip was actually developing. Praise God! We were sent home and asked to continue wearing the brace and our improvised support, then come back next month. I thought we were going to put Seth on a cast that day, but we went home rejoicing for the good feedback. After weeks and months of hearing that the harness and brace were not working, and his hip was getting worse. That day was different. The next visit was for his head. To check the fluid in it. Mom and I went and did the usual, ultrasound then go to the doctor for the reading. I was teary eyed when the doctor said that Seth&#x27;s right external hydrocephalus decreased, while it remained the same size on the left part. His head cricumference also did not increase, unlike the months before. His head size is now at the normal size of a 9 month old baby boy... His internal hydrocephalus remained the same as it was 3months ago, if not smaller. For how many weeks, all we heard was his head was getting larger, but that day was different. God answered my prayers differently this time. CONTINUED IN COMMENTS...</a></div><p style="color:#c9c8cd;font-family:Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;line-height:17px;margin-bottom:0;margin-top:8px;overflow:hidden;padding:8px 0 7px;text-align:center;text-overflow:ellipsis;white-space:nowrap">A post shared by <a href="https://www.instagram.com/wendyvaldez_garcia/" style="color:#c9c8cd;font-family:Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;font-style:normal;font-weight:normal;line-height:17px" target="_blank"> Wendy Valdez-Garcia</a> (@wendyvaldez_garcia) on <time dateTime="2018-04-13T12:06:29+00:00" style="font-family:Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;line-height:17px">Apr 13, 2018 at 5:06am PDT</time></p></div></blockquote><script async="" defer="" src="~//www.instagram.com/embed.js" type="text/javascript"></script>