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“Walang ghosting kung wala pang kapalit:” Alyssa Muhlach spots relationship red flags

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Liezel dela Cruz

<p><strong><u>“<a href="https://ent.abs-cbn.com/2good2betrue"><em>2 Good 2 Be True</em></a>”</u></strong> star Alyssa Muhlach turned into a love guru as she reviews five scenarios that may or may not be a cheating red flag. Check out her intelligent pieces of advice in this episode of Kapamilya Chat.</p><div><strong>1. The cell phone becomes off-limits </strong></div><p>It’s a red flag for Alyssa, especially if it happens so suddenly, “Hindi naman ‘yung necessarily i-che-check mo, pero bakit parang may patago effect, ‘di ba?”</p><div><strong>2. I need space</strong></div><p>Not a red flag. The beauty queen-turned-actress believes that asking for space is needed for self-awareness and may not necessarily signal cheating. She said people grow, thus the change in goals, beliefs, and values a few years into the relationship. And couples must take time to think through these changes. </p><p>“I also feel like some people want space para lang isipin ‘yung relationship nila… It’s not necessarily cheating but sometimes people realize after how many years na magkaiba pala tayo ng gusto. Kunwari, ‘yung isa ayaw ng anak, ‘yung isa gusto ng anak. Better ng early on malaman bago pa kayo mag-asawa ‘di ba para you’re not going to hurt each other in marriage pa,” she said.</p><p>But, “Huwag naman ‘yung ghosting level”</p><div><strong>3. They don’t go to bed at the same time</strong></div><p>For Alyssa, the more important factor is the “same bed” than the “same time.” After all, we all have different routines. It only becomes a problem when the partner starts to sleep in a separate room. “I noticed ‘yung mga couples na they don’t stay in same bed na, parang they’re not in love with each other anymore.” She’s already met a lot of couple who stay in the same house but sleep in different beds just for the sake of marital status.</p><div><strong>4. They become unreliable or suspicious</strong></div><p>Red flag! Alyssa gave emphasis on couples with interdependent relationships. “If you’re relationship dynamics is you rely on each other, tapos one day busy na siya, parang red flag na siya because there was a change in the relationship dynamics,” she explained.</p><div><strong>5. When your intuition is talking to you</strong></div><p>In spotting red flags, Alyssa respects what her instinct tells her. She said girls are very observant, and most of the time, the little clues can dig up bigger red flags. “Mafe-feel mo, eh. Yun nga, sa small things, makikita mo ‘yung differences. In his actions, in his words, in your relationship together, makikita mo talaga,” shared Alyssa.</p><p>Don’t break up right away though, just communicate and trust. Remember that the only way to confirm your gut feeling is to actually ask. She explained, “Totoo naman ‘yung sinasabi ng mga lalaki na, ‘Hindi ko nababasa ‘yang isip mo.’ Kailangan mo talagang sabihin. Communication is a two-way process, eh. Kailangan si girl, magsabi. Si guy, kailangan rin siya magsabi… You have to tell me just as I have to tell you in order for the relationship to work.”</p><p>To cap it off, Alyssa revealed what she considers the biggest red flags in a relationship: ghosting and cheating, “Naniniwala ako na walang ghosting kung wala pang kapalit. Hindi ka mang-iiwan ng partner kung wala pang kapalit. Kasi kung wala pang kapalit, kakausapin mo muna ‘yung current mo, ‘di ba?”</p><p>To set the record straight, yes, she’s been ghosted. So, to pretty girls like her, remember: “Ang pagiging faithful ng isang lalaki at ‘yung hindi ka niya igo-ghost, wala ‘yan sa ganda.”</p>

Find practical pieces of advice in this Kapamilya Chat challenge with Alyssa Muhlach