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Here's how you can deal with ghosting, or avoid ghosting yourself

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ABS-CBN News

<div class="embed-wrap"><figure data-feedback="fb:likes,fb:comments"><img alt="ABS-CBN News/File" src="https://sa.kapamilya.com/absnews/abscbnnews/media/2018/news/03/22/20160624-manila-weather-jc-1.jpg"/><figcaption>A couple sits along the breakwater on Manila Bay on Friday as storm clouds gather on the horizon. Jonathan Cellona, ABS-CBN News/File</figcaption></figure></div>MANILA -- While it can make a person feel alone, ghosting is a common experience for people in the dating scene.Lucille McCart, APAC communications director of the dating platform Bumble, recently shared her thoughts about ghosting which she defined as cutting off communication without explanation.&quot;Sometimes there are warning signs -- like slow replies or one-word replies that don&#x27;t reciprocate interest. But often, it also happens abruptly,&quot; she said in an email interview.Citing Bumble&#x27;s recent study, she noted that 46% of Filipino singles have ghosted someone, and 56% have experienced being ghosted before. As to why Filipinos ghost others, survey results showed not feeling a connection, becoming busy, and avoiding an awkward conversation as common reasons.&quot;People ghost because of their own shortcomings -- they didn’t know how to express themselves, they weren&#x27;t in a space to be dating, or they didn’t have the courage to be honest,&quot; McCart said.&quot;While it might feel like ghosting is a gentler way to spare someone’s feelings, it can have the opposite effect, leaving the person who has been ghosted feeling confused and hurt with no closure,&quot; she added.<ul class="op-related-articles">	<li><a href="https://news.abs-cbn.com/life/09/23/22/more-than-5-of-10-filipinos-experienced-ghosting">More than 5 out of 10 Filipinos experienced ghosting: Bumble survey</a></li></ul>McCart acknowledged that being ghosted cannot be avoided as one cannot control the actions of others. She stressed, however, that there is still a way to deal with it properly to be able to move forward. &quot;If being ghosted makes you feel alone, I would encourage you to open up to your friends about this because it is a very common experience of dating and you will probably discover it has happened to everyone,&quot; she said. &quot;The best thing you can do is focus your time and energy on the people who are reciprocal in their communication, and leave those old connections who ghosted you in the past,&quot; she added. As for people who are thinking of resorting to ghosting to get out of a dating situation, McCart gave them this reminder: &quot;If you are no longer feeling a connection with a match, lead with kindness in your approach. There are some easy and simple ways to communicate how you are feeling, instead of just cutting off communication.&quot; &quot;For example a text saying, &#x27;I have really enjoyed getting to know you, but I am not feeling a romantic connection. If we keep talking, it would just be on a friendship level for me.&#x27; This lets the person know how you are feeling and gives them the agency to decide if they are interested in a friendship or not,&quot; she explained.&quot;Remember that a text is fine for someone you have only been texting with or when things are very casual, but if you have been on a few dates or are actively dating, then an in-person conversation is the best way to go.&quot;And if a ghoster wants to reconnect, McCart shared this advice: &quot;If you aren’t interested in reconnecting, don’t counter bad behavior with more bad behavior. A polite text saying you aren’t interested is best.&quot; &quot;If you do want to reconnect, don’t be afraid to raise their previous behavior so you can decide for yourself if you can forgive and forget,&quot; she said.McCart said Bumble has been building a safe dating community for its users, particularly in the Philippines, with the platform having features such as photo verification and private detector.&quot;These features prevent catfishing, allow our community to request for their matches to verify their identity, and stops the sharing of unsolicited, nude images,&quot; she said. &quot;In any situation on Bumble where you feel uncomfortable, you should feel empowered to break off communication and use our Block + Report tool to report the behavior to our team of moderators,&quot; she added. <div>Related video:</div><figure class="op-interactive"><iframe allow="autoplay; fullscreen" frameBorder="0" height="100%" id="ivsplayer01" scrolling="no" src="https://player.ivideosmart.com/ivsplayer/v4/dist/html/iframe-src.html?iframeid=ivsplayer01&amp;key=e8c22c015ca9eafa76f1e3edfa03c603&amp;spid=3001339&amp;vid=2143566" width="100%"></iframe></figure><div class="iwantbar">Watch more News on <a href="https://www.iwanttfc.com/#!/browse/Genres/News/tag_id_genres/id_news" target="_blank">iWantTFC</a></div>

While it can make a person feel alone, ghosting is a common experience for people in the dating scene.