Bullying comes in various forms, from physical aggression to cyberbullying. It may leave a lasting impact on individuals and communities alike, and it is a problem that may affect anyone, including Kapamilya actress Jodi Sta Maria.

Sta. Maria recently opened up about her son, Thirdy Lacson, who faced bullying in grade school. Despite being abroad for work, she took immediate action and made the proper steps to address the situation.

Jodi Sta. Maria with her son Thirdy, "I always remind my son about the golden rule, 'Treat others the way you want to be treated." Photo source: Jodi Sta. Maria Instagram

"It happened way back when he was in grade school," Sta. Maria opens, "I remember that I was abroad doing a show. and I was sent photos of what happened to my son. I was alarmed and I initially felt helpless because I was so far away. I called him to check on him and thought of actions that could be done to address it."

Feeling guilty and helpless for not being there to protect her son, Sta. Maria packed her things and returned to Manila.

 "Nasa trabaho ako 'di ba and wala ako dun sa side niya when it happened. Ang nangyari as a galit na mother, umuwi ako ng Pilipinas, nakipag-set ako ng meeting sa school," narrates Jodi.

(I was at work and I was not on his side when it happened. What happened was, as an angry mother, I went back to the Philippines, I set a meeting with the school.)

Even though Thirdy's parents are separated, they are on good terms and choose to co-parent. Both of them were there for Thirdy, showing him love and care.

"It is not easy to deal with these things. Thirdy's dad and I had different approaches. 'Yung isa an eye for an eye, me naman, I would say how to resolve it in a way na hindi mag-escalate 'yung problem," (One [handles things] eye for an eye, while me, I would say to resolve it in a way that the problem will not escalate) she explained. "I had to set a meeting with the school to find out what happened. We felt sad when it happened. Honestly, it angered me too."

Early this year, Senator Sherwin Gatchalian raised concerns about the number of cases of bullying reported by the Department of Education (DepEd), which does not add to the numbers provided by the World Health Organization (WHO).

In the hearing of the Senate Committee of Education presided over by Gatchalian, he noted that WHO said 40.6 percent of children are bullied while the Deped noted that pre-pandemic numbers of bullying cases from 2018-2019 reached 21,521. Gatchalian observed a massive underreporting at the school level.

Say it with ingat

As for Sta. Maria, communication played a vital role in this situation. She also shared key points in building a healthy and caring relationship with children.

"Communicate. Ask questions," she says. "Look for verbal and non-verbal cues. Sometimes they are not comfortable to share. But if we talk to our children in a non-judgemental way, I guess that will help them open up more easily."

Parenting a school-age child may be challenging, but in this digital age where online bullying is the most common medium, they need love, care, and guidance. Being intentional about our words and actions online or face to face is a way to care, and it starts with us.

"People pay attention more to what we do than what is said. It is not what we say but we say it that matters. It is being there for them when they need us and checking up on them. We really cannot control how others behave, but we can have hope that through our actions, they will realize that there are other ways to respond," she says.

"I always remind my son of the golden rule: 'Treat others the way you want to be treated.' Now if they still believe otherwise then it is on the person na." Sta. Maria said.

In a recent podcast episode of "Paano Ba 'To: The Podcast", Jodi Sta.Maria and host, Bianca Gonzalez delved deeper into the issue of bullying, and shared insights on how to respond to negativity and say it with "ingat" (care).

Tune in to this insightful podcast episode, now streaming on Spotify

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ASC Reference No.: U0162P020724B