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Former TV personality Jude Bacalso has apologized over a controversy at a Cebu City restaurant where a server had to stand for hours after addressing her as “sir”, but the incident shows a need “for greater strides for gender equality,” LGBTQIA+ rights advocates said.

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LGBTQIA 070252024

ABS-CBN News Intern

<p>MANILA — Former TV personality Jude Bacalso has apologized over a controversy at a Cebu City restaurant where a server had to stand for hours after addressing her as “sir”, but the incident shows a need “for greater strides for gender equality,” LGBTQIA+ rights advocates said.</p><p>Gender identity and expression — through the use of preferred pronouns, for example — has been a thorny issue in the Philippines, and even in Western democracies like the United States. </p><div><a href="https://news.abs-cbn.com/news/06/29/22/lgbtq-community-in-ny-demands-protection-of-rights">FROM THE ARCHIVES: LGBTQ+ community in NY demands protection of rights</a></div><p>“Being misgendered is a challenging experience,” according to Thysz Estrada, chair of gender-inclusivity advocacy organization Pantay, “but I always hope to handle it with patience and grace, especially if they&#x27;re only coming from a point of ignorance.” </p><div><span class="fr-video fr-deletable fr-fvc fr-dvb fr-draggable" contenteditable="false" draggable="true"><iframe width="640" height="360" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/FAkLNEEZtV8?&amp;wmode=opaque&amp;rel=0" frameBorder="0" allowfullscreen="" class="fr-draggable"></iframe></span><br/></div><p>“For others facing this situation, I recommend staying calm, politely correcting the person, and using it as an opportunity to educate. It&#x27;s important to advocate for oneself while also fostering an environment where people can learn and grow,” she said.</p><p>When someone misgenders her, Estrada addresses it by calmly saying something like, &quot;Actually, my pronouns are she/her,&quot; or &quot;You can just call me by my name.&quot;</p><p>If the person is open to it, she briefly explains why using a person’s preferred pronouns is important. </p><p>“It&#x27;s about creating a respectful dialogue and helping others understand the impact of their words,” she said.</p><p>Receiving an apology or acknowledgment for misgendering is crucial as it validates the person’s experience and identity, rebuilds trust, and shows a willingness to learn and improve.</p><p>“It affirms [the person’s] dignity and reinforces that their identity is respected and acknowledged,” Estrada said.</p><div><a href="https://news.abs-cbn.com/regions/2024/7/23/jude-bacalso-sorry-for-berating-server-who-called-her-sir-1238">READ: Jude Bacalso sorry for berating server who called her &#x27;sir&#x27;</a></div><div><strong>&#x27;RESPECT EACH OTHERS&#x27; HUMANITY&#x27;</strong></div><p>Reyna Valmores, chair of Bahaghari — a national alliance of LGBTQIA+ advocates — Valmores emphasized that recognizing how individuals are named, greeted, and referred to is part of respecting each other’s humanity.</p><p>&quot;Misgendering should be addressed and corrected,&quot; Valmores said in a series of posts on social media platform X, adding accidental misgendering can often be remedied by simply stating how one would like to be addressed.</p><p>She said, though, that there are situations where misgendering is clearly malicious, particularly when a person spitefully continues to misgender someone after being corrected. </p><p>In those cases, misgendering would be &quot;clear-cut discrimination and chauvinism,&quot; she said.</p><p>Valmores acknowledged that Bacalso’s reaction to the incident in Cebu may have been excessive, especially if the misgendering was unintentional, but that it does not invalidate how she felt about being misgendered.</p><p>&quot;LGBTQ+ persons, as with any person facing abuse, should not have to be perfect victims just to be believed,” she said.</p><p>“We do not have to be angelic and helpless all the time just for people to finally recognize that something is wrong and that we need greater strides for gender equality.”</p><div><strong>TOWARDS MORE GENDER SENSITIVITY, INCLUSIVENESS</strong></div><p>For restaurant and business owners, Pantay advises implementing Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion (DEI) policies to create a welcoming and respectful environment for LGBTQIA+ customers. </p><p>“These policies benefit employees and businesses by fostering a culture of inclusivity and are fundamentally the right thing to do,” Estrada said.</p><p>Businesses are encouraged to actively engage in DEI training, establish clear anti-discrimination policies, and ensure that all staff are educated on the importance of respecting every individual&#x27;s identity.</p><p>Embracing these practices enhances customer satisfaction and strengthens the overall business by demonstrating a commitment to equality and respect, she said.</p><p>Pantay undertakes several key initiatives to promote gender sensitivity and respect in public spaces.</p><div><a href="https://news.abs-cbn.com/news/12/26/23/lgbt-committee-welcome-but-lacks-inclusivity-groups">READ: LGBT committee welcome but &#x27;lacks inclusivity&#x27;: groups</a></div><p>“We conduct comprehensive gender sensitivity training sessions aimed at educating individuals on the importance of respect and inclusivity. These sessions target a wide range of audiences, including local government units (LGUs), various sectors, and community organizations,” Estrada said.</p><p>Pantay also engages in advocacy efforts to lobby for policies against discrimination and for mutual respect, ensuring that public spaces remain safe and welcoming for everyone.</p><p>“We consider the Safe Spaces Act a significant legislative success, as it includes provisions that classify transphobic remarks as harassment,” Estrada added.</p><div style="margin-bottom:0px;line-height:normal"><a href="https://news.abs-cbn.com/news/2024/6/10/alamin-karapatan-ng-komyuter-laban-sa-sexual-harassment-2307">ALAMIN: Karapatan ng komyuter laban sa sexual harassment</a></div><div style="margin-bottom:0px;line-height:normal"><br/></div><p style="margin-bottom:0px;line-height:normal">These legislative changes are important in safeguarding the rights and dignity of LGBTQIA+ peeople in public establishments, she said.</p><div style="margin-bottom:0px;line-height:normal"><br/></div><p style="margin-bottom:0px;line-height:normal">Pantay also vigorously advocates for the passage of the SOGIE (Sexual Orientation, Gender Identity, and Expression) Equality Bill, as well as for local anti-discrimination ordinances, to provide comprehensive protection for LGBTQIA+ individuals.</p><div style="margin-bottom:0px;line-height:normal"><br/></div><div style="margin-bottom:0px;line-height:normal"><a href="https://news.abs-cbn.com/news/2024/6/3/chiz-says-sogie-bill-must-be-amended-first-to-get-senate-approval-1045">READ: Chiz says SOGIE bill must be amended first to get Senate approval</a></div><div style="margin-bottom:0px;line-height:normal"><br/></div><p style="margin-bottom:0px;line-height:normal">Valmores meanwhile emphasized government’s role in raising public consciousness on gender to eliminate discrimination. </p><div style="margin-bottom:0px;line-height:normal"><br/></div><p style="margin-bottom:0px;line-height:normal">She expressed disappointment over President Marcos Jr.&#x27;s failure to mention the LGBTQIA+ community or the SOGIE Equality Bill in his recent State of the Nation Address.</p><div style="margin-bottom:0px;line-height:normal"><br/></div><p>The SOGIE Equality Bill penalizes discrimination based on a person&#x27;s sexual orientation, gender identity and expression and has met opposition in Congress, especially over a supposed conflict with freedom of religion.<br/><br/>&quot;We are disappointed, but unsurprised to hear that for the third consecutive time, President Marcos Jr. has made zero mention of the LGBTQ+ community, let alone the SOGIE Equality Bill as a priority measure, in his State of the Nation Address,&quot; Valmores said.</p><div><br/></div><div><strong>RELATED VIDEO: </strong></div><div><span class="fr-video fr-deletable fr-fvc fr-dvb fr-draggable" contenteditable="false" draggable="true"><iframe width="640" height="360" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/dZoeG6LO5Ls?&amp;wmode=opaque&amp;rel=0" frameBorder="0" allowfullscreen="" class="fr-draggable"></iframe></span><br/></div><div><br/></div>

<p>Former TV personality Jude Bacalso has apologized over a controversy at a Cebu City restaurant where a server had to stand for hours after addressing her as “sir”, but the incident shows a need “for greater strides for gender equality,” LGBTQIA+ rights advocates said.</p>

Cebu restaurant incident highlights need for gender inclusivity: LGBTQIA+ advocates

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Cebu restaurant incident highlights need for gender inclusivity: LGBTQIA+ advocates

ABS-CBN News Intern,

Acel Fernando

Published Jul 25, 2024 11:48 AM PHT

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LGBTQIA+

Gender issues

gender identity

Pantay

Bahaghari

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