Members and allies of the LGBTQ+ community participate in the Pride March. Maria Tan, ABS-CBN News/File

MANILA — It's Pride Month again, and LGBTQ+ organizations are expected to renew their longstanding call for queer rights and an end to discrimination. 

While LGBTQ+ people are on the frontlines in the struggle for equality, allies — or anyone supportive of queer causes — also have a role in the crusade, especially in a country where majority of people practice Christianity.

"It makes equality a shared fight, not just ours," said Thysz Estrada, chairperson of the anti-discrimination group PANTAY that advocates for progressive and gender-transformative legislation. 

"Because when more people stand up, the system can't ignore us," she added.

But what is genuine LGBTQ+ allyship, and how can one be better? 

Estrada said that being an ally involves "listening, unlearning, speaking up, and showing up."

Allyship also means standing with LGBTQ+ people not just in words but also in action, she said in an online exchange with ABS-CBN News. 

Allies use their privilege and influence "to support our rights, our dignity, and our humanity," said Estrada, a trans woman.

"If it's safe for you to speak up, do it," she said in Filipino. "It feels completely different when you have an ally who speaks out against discrimination," Estrada said, also noting that allyship "saves lives."

Despite decades of calls, the Philippines still struggles to pass the anti-discrimination SOGIESC Equality Bill. The nation also grapples with passing legislation that would allow same-sex partners to marry or enter into unions that grant them the same rights as heterosexual couples.

Responding to the lack of a national law, several local government units, in recent years, have passed piecemeal ordinances protecting LGBTQ+ individuals against discrimination as well as allowing queer couples decide on medical concerns.

HOW TO BE BETTER ALLIES IN OFFICES, COMMUNITIES, FAMILIES

Allies in workplaces and communities also play a role in making their spaces safe for queer people. 

Bosses should ensure that there are policies to protect LGBTQ+ employees, said Estrada.

Telling employees that "we don’t discriminate" is not enough, she said, because there should be concrete policies for LGBTQ+ workers, including inclusive healthcare.

"As colleagues, don't tolerate jokes or remarks" that are homophobic or transphobic, she added. "Normalize asking pronouns, support transition needs," and respect how people present themselves.

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For Estrada, allyship is also about creating inclusive communities.

She urged allies to raise awareness in churches, schools, and even in sports clubs and push for inclusive programs. She said it would be helpful to invite LGBTQ+ speakers or volunteers, noting that "visibility breeds understanding."

Having allies in a family where there is an LGBTQ+ person is also crucial.

She told allies to defend LGBTQIA+ siblings or relatives during instances where they are being teased for being different by educating with patience and firmness. "Modeling acceptance can go a long way," she said.

HOW DOES ONE START BECOMING AN ALLY?  

Anyone can be an ally by starting to reflect on their own biases and acknowledging them, Estrada said. The goal, she said, is not to be guilty about these biases, but to unlearn them.

It is also encouraged to connect with LGBTQ+ individuals and hear their stories, experiences, and struggles. 

One can start from attending Pride events "not just to not just to celebrate, but to understand."

"If you feel discomfort, ask: 'Am I uncomfortable because it’s wrong, or because it challenges what I was taught?'" Estrada said.

Genuine allies are humble, compassionate, curious, brave, and are open to corrections, she said.

IS THERE A FAKE ALLY?

Estrada cautioned that fake allies — what she called "rainbow for clout" — exist.

They say "love wins" but are silent if there's injustice or harassment towards LGBTQ+ people, she said.

"And yes, you can call yourself 'progressive' but still fall short of being an ally. It happens all the time," she said.

"There are progressive people in politics, in climate justice, in labor rights, but when it comes to LGBTQ+ rights, they are quiet or defensive. Allyship requires consistency; you can’t pick and choose whose dignity you’ll fight for."

— Lawrence Coruno, ABS-CBN News Digital Intern; and Rowegie Abanto, ABS-CBN News

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