“Ingat kayo sa masyadong sweet”: Zanjoe and Sue on relationship red flags

We often hear the phrase “red flags” these days. In a romantic angle, red flags refer to the warning signs about a person’s true nature and motive, or that a relationship is doomed. They sound easy to detect, right? But for people who are deeply invested in a relationship, red flags are easily ignored because they are, well, too blinded by love that they can’t see the signs clearly.

That said, “The Broken Marriage Vow” stars Zanjoe Marudo and Sue Ramirez are here to help you see beyond your rose-colored glasses.

1. Keeping an extra phone

Remember how Jill (Jodi Sta Maria) discovered David (Zanjoe) and Lexy (Sue)’s affair? Extra phones mean extra secrets to keep.

2. I need space

“Bakit hindi ka mag-astronaut kung gusto mo ng space?” quipped Sue, who believes that asking for space is a bad omen especially for couples who have been together for years. For Zanjoe, on the other hand, it’s not an outright deal-breaker but signals the need to take a pause, “Hindi muna ako mag-iisip. Kung kailangan niya, ibigay mo. Baka naman masyado ka nang nakakasakal.” That “space,” however, gives them time to weigh in on their feelings. It can either lead to a fresh start or a breakup, so you must be ready.

3. When they sleep in a separate room

For Sue, this one’s truly heart-breaking, considering that as humans we need warmth from the people we love. “Malungkot siguro ‘yun. ‘Yung dadating kayong mag-asawa sa point na hindi na kayo magkatabi matutulog o kung magkatabi man, talikuran na kayo. ‘Yung mga simple pero napakasakit na problema sa mga mag-partner,” she said.

4. Inconsistency

Albeit not always third party-related, for Sue, inconsistency signals too much laxity in the relationship, “Minsan katamaran, hindi lang kabit. Ang kalaban mo din diyan ‘yung pagiging kampante ng partner mo, na feeling niya na kahit hindi ka na niya sundin, hindi mo pa rin siya kayang iwan.”

She added that communication could help solve this problem, especially since unmet expectations can kill a relationship. “Sometimes you have to point it out. Our partners, they are not mind readers. There are some things that we want but they can’t really understand. Be direct to the point. Sabihin mo na lang kung anong gusto mo. May mga tao namang ganyan, ‘Gusto mo ng bulaklak? Sige bibilhan kita ng bulaklak.’ Sabihin mo na lang. Sometime we also have to make adjustments. We also have to be more vocal sa mga partner natin.”

5. Lying or making “palusot”

While Zanjoe isn’t really an over thinker, unreliability is something that usually proves his instinct right, “Mag-iisip ka na n’un. Baka hindi ka na trip n’ung tao. Kasi ang totoong nagmamahal, lagi kang pakikinggan o uunawain tapos kung may mali sa’yo, ipapaliwanag.”

6. Cheating

When caught cheating, some continue to lie while others opt to confess and make promises (often sugar-coated hoping for a quick fix). Either way, for Sue, cheating is a non-negotiable deal breaker. “I don’t think ako ‘yung tipo ng tao na pag nag-cheat ‘yung partner ko bibigyan ko pa siya ng pagkakataon. Kasi I know how loyal I can be and how much I can give. Of course, it’s only right that I expect the same thing from my partner. Hindi naman to surpass but at least nakikita mo na nag-e-effort,” she related.

7. Going home late

Learning from his character in The Broken Marriage Vow, Zanjoe said going home late, especially when the constant excuse is working overtime, should make you second-guess.

8. Acting too sweet

Did you know that even sweet things can be red flags? There’s a difference between caring genuinely, and soothing the guilt. As Zanjoe put it, “Alam mong ‘pag ganyang lambing, alam mong may kasalanan, eh. Kaya ingat kayo sa masyadong sweet.”

Learn more relationship red flags from The Broken Marriage Vow, weeknights, on Kapamilya Channel, Kapamilya Online Live, and A2Z.