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John Lloyd Cruz draws the line between love and ownership in ‘In My Life’

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Alyana De Guzman

Push Team

<div><img src="https://od2-image-api.abs-cbn.com/prod/editorImage/1771910988595WST26-AC_15-JohnLloydCruz.png" style="width:960px" class="fr-fic fr-dib" width="960"/></div><p>“Anak mo lang siya, hindi mo siya pag-aari!”   </p><p>This line comes from the 2009 Star Cinema drama film<em> In My Life</em>, directed by Olivia Lamasan. It was spoken by Noel (John Lloyd Cruz), the calm yet quietly strong boyfriend of Mark (Luis Manzano). In a confrontation with Mark’s mother, Shirley (Vilma Santos), Noel pushes back against the idea that being a parent means total ownership over a child. It is a painful but honest reminder that love is not about control, but about respect and acceptance. </p><p>In the film, Shirley is a strict and controlling mother who has long believed that guiding her children also means tightly holding on to them. That belief, however, has created distance, especially with her youngest son Mark, who has built a life far from her in New York. Hoping to reconnect, Shirley travels abroad, expecting a simple visit. Instead, she is confronted with a reality she did not prepare for as Mark has a relationship with Noel. </p><div><a href="https://www.abs-cbn.com/entertainment/showbiz/celebrities/2026/2/5/luis-manzano-recalls-doing-more-than-one-kissing-scene-with-john-lloyd-cruz-for-movie-0831" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank"><strong>READ: Luis Manzano recalls doing more than one kissing scene with John Lloyd Cruz for movie</strong></a></div><p>From the start, Shirley treats Noel with suspicion. As she observes their daily routines and shares a home with them, she struggles to accept the depth of their bond. Her attempts to interfere and reassert control only heighten the tension between the couple, exposing unresolved issues of authority, love, and trust. </p><p>The conflict intensifies when Shirley discovers that Mark has been battling cancer, a truth she feels was unfairly kept from her. Her anger is directed at Noel, whom she accuses of taking away her right as a mother to know and decide. Noel, however, stands firm, explaining that he and Mark faced the illness together, as partners.  </p><p>Eventually, Mark finds the courage to speak openly to his mother. He lays bare his fears, his struggles, and his love for Noel, hoping she will finally see him for who he is. It is a turning point for Shirley, who slowly begins to grasp that loving her son also means letting him live his own truth. They reach a fragile understanding, and Shirley starts to loosen her grip. </p><div><iframe src="https://www.facebook.com/plugins/video.php?height=314&amp;href=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.facebook.com%2FABSCBNSagipPelikula%2Fvideos%2F1167549813751734%2F&amp;show_text=false&amp;width=560&amp;t=0" width="560" height="314" style="border:none;overflow:hidden" scrolling="no" frameBorder="0" allowfullscreen=""></iframe></div><p>Just as things seem calmer, tragedy strikes. Mark, recovering from surgery and preparing for chemotherapy, is hit by a car and fatally injured. In the aftermath, Noel becomes the keeper of Mark’s final wishes about organ donation and cremation, the very choices he made for himself with clarity and peace. </p><p>This leads to the film’s most unforgettable line and confrontation. At the funeral, Shirley insists on bringing Mark back to the Philippines, unable to accept the idea of cremation. Declaring that she is Mark’s mother and knows him best, she clashes once more with Noel. It is then that Noel delivers the now-iconic line, reminding her that Mark is shaped by all the people who loved him, and that being a parent does not mean owning a child’s life or even their death. </p><p>The moment explodes with grief and anger, culminating in Shirley slapping Noel, which made him instinctively slap her back. The scene shocked viewers and continues to leave audiences stunned today, especially because it shows how love, pain, and loss can push even the most patient person to finally fight back. </p><p>More than a decade since the film’s release, it still strikes a nerve, especially among viewers who deeply relate to the opposing emotions embodied by its lead characters. For many viewers, the power of the line lies in how clearly it reflects real-life conflicts between parents and those who love their children. Audiences have shared how they resonated with Shirley’s pain and inability to let go during loss. Her anger, denial, and desperation felt familiar to those who have experienced grief and fear of losing the people they love most. </p><p>At the same time, viewers strongly connected with Noel’s perspective. Throughout the film, Noel is portrayed as patient and restrained, absorbing Shirley’s suspicions. When he finally delivers the line, many viewers felt it was long overdue. For them, Noel became the voice of those who love quietly, endure silently, and are often dismissed or underestimated, especially as a partner. His words resonated with audiences who have had to fight to be seen, heard, and respected, especially in moments when their love is questioned. </p><p>The confrontation scene struck a chord because it did not ask viewers to choose sides easily. This emotional tension is what kept viewers on edge, making the scene feel painfully real rather than scripted.  </p><p>When the digitally restored version of<em> In My Life</em> was released on ABS-CBN Star Cinema’s YouTube channel, viewers once again poured out their reactions, saying the confrontation felt even more intense with time. </p><p>“This movie teaches us a lot about understanding, compassion, and seeing beyond our own perspectives. It&#x27;s one of those Filipino films na may substance talaga and tackles important themes without being preachy. Ang ganda ng storytelling!” one viewer wrote. </p><p>“Such a great movie. Made me cry on the mother&#x27;s struggle, and even on the confrontation scene of JL and ate Vi. 🤧,” another shared. </p><p>“Grabe ang intense... Ngayun ko lang to nakita John Loyd sinampal niya si Vilma,” another added. </p><div><iframe width="838" height="471" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/yMWIUEAYdTg" title="John Lloyd refused to slap Vilma Santos in ‘In My Life’?  | ABS-CBN Film Restoration #SagipPelikula" frameBorder="0" allowfullscreen=""></iframe></div><p>Vilma later revealed in 2022 that John Lloyd was hesitant to slap her during the confrontation out of deep respect, resulting in hours of discussion on set. </p><p>“Ayaw akong sampalin ni Lloydie (John Lloyd). Nag-iintay kami. Sabi ni Inang (Direk Olivia) ‘Kailangan mong sampalin si Ate Vi (Vilma) kasi kailangan ‘yan sa eksena.’ Talagang ayaw ni Lloydie. Pinipilit niya na wag na lang akong sampalin. Inabot kami ng 5:00 a.m. para kumbinsihin lang si John Lloyd na sampalin ako,” she recalled.  </p><p>She added, “Alam mo si Lloydie hindi alam ang gagawin. Hinihintay namin siya. Mino-motivate namin siya. Sabi ko, ‘Lloydie sampalin mo na ako okay lang sa akin ‘yun. Kaya ko, sanay akong sinasampal. Go ahead’. Hanggang sa pumayag din sa wakas.” </p><p>According to Vilma, John Lloyd was told that if the slap did not come across strongly, they would need another take. Wanting to avoid repeating such an emotionally heavy scene, he finally went through with it in one take. </p><p>“That was one take lang. Yakap yakap ako ni Lloydie at sorry siya nang sorry,” she said. </p><p>Because of how convincingly Noel and Shirley were portrayed, audiences and critics alike praised the performances. At the 26th PMPC Star Awards for Movies, John Lloyd won Movie Actor of the Year, Vilma was named Movie Actress of the Year, while Luis won Movie Supporting Actor of the Year. The film also earned Movie Director of the Year (for Olivia Lamasan) and Movie of the Year honors. </p><div><br/></div><div><iframe class="instagram-media instagram-media-rendered" id="instagram-embed-6" src="https://www.instagram.com/reel/DUHyLyyk8RM/embed/captioned/?cr=1&amp;v=14&amp;wp=607&amp;rd=https%3A%2F%2Fod2-workbench-web.abs-cbn.com&amp;rp=%2F#%7B%22ci%22%3A6%2C%22os%22%3A13540856.80000019%2C%22ls%22%3A179440.7000002861%2C%22le%22%3A179443%7D" allowtransparency="true" allowfullscreen="" frameBorder="0" height="987" data-instgrm-payload-id="instagram-media-payload-6" scrolling="no" style="background:white;max-width:540px;width:calc(100% - 2px);border-radius:3px;border:1px solid rgb(219, 219, 219);box-shadow:none;display:block;margin:0px 0px 12px;min-width:326px;padding:0px"></iframe></div><script async="" src="//www.instagram.com/embed.js"></script><div><br/></div><p>In early February this year, Luis reflected on the film as one of his most unforgettable projects, revealing that several kissing scenes with John Lloyd were shot but only one made it to the final cut. He praised the complexity of their characters and expressed pride in being part of a story that portrayed love with honesty and depth. </p><p>“Ang galing ni Lloydie at saka ni mommy sa movie na ito. Sobrang galing nila. So nakakatuwa na nakagawa ako ng isang movie na ganitong character, complex yung gay characters namin. So nakaka-proud. Sana kinilig din kayo sa amin ni Lloydie!” </p><p>In the end, the lasting impact of John Lloyd’s line comes from how viewers continue to see themselves in Noel and Shirley. The line lives on because it captures a universal struggle of holding on and letting go. It is a moment that continues to challenge audiences to reflect on how they love, and how far they are willing to understand the pain of others. </p><p>Watch<em> In My Life</em> on ABS-CBN Star Cinema’s official YouTube channel.</p>

<p>This line comes from the 2009 Star Cinema drama 'In My Life,' spoken by John Lloyd Cruz as Noel during a confrontation with Vilma Santos as Shirley, portraying grief, love, and the painful act of letting go.</p>

This line comes from the 2009 Star Cinema drama 'In My Life,' spoken by John Lloyd Cruz as Noel during a confrontation with Vilma Santos as Shirley, portraying grief, love, and the painful act of letting go.

WHO SAID THIS: John Lloyd Cruz draws the line between love and ownership in ‘In My Life’

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WHO SAID THIS: John Lloyd Cruz draws the line between love and ownership in ‘In My Life’

Alyana De Guzman,

Push Team

Published Feb 24, 2026 01:30 PM PHT

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In My Life

Who Said This

John Lloyd Cruz

Vilma Santos

Luis Manzano

Star Cinema

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